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This Is So Sudden ! 



A Farce in One Act 



By 
MacPHERSON janney 

Author of "Mr. Kellej from Kalamazoo,'* 
"Picking a Winnery'' etc. 



BOSTON 

WALTER H. BAKER & CO. 
1915 






This Is So Sudden ! 



CHARACTERS 

Gertrude, aged twenty -five | 

Florence, aged twenty \ bachelor girls. 

Marie, aged twenty-two \ 

Helen, a woman of the world, aged thirty-five.. 

Margaret, a society girl. 

Plays Twenty Minutes. 




Copyright, 1915, by Walter H. Baker & Co. 



©CID 40645 

M/in4J9l5 . 



This Is So Sudden! 



SCENE. — The living-room of a small apartment furnished 
in perfect taste. Various signs indicate that the inhabitants 
are artistic and musical. Entrances r. and l. Telephone. 
Sofa. 

{As the curtain rises, Gertrude aiid Helen are in the act 
of fervently greeting each other. Ger. is an attractive, 
impulsive girl of twenty-five ; Helen is ten years her 
senior, a woman of the world, with an abrupt and con- 
clusive manner. All the characters greet Helen with an 
air of cordial excitement ; she is evidently an old and well 
loved friend.) 

Ger, So good of you to come this evening, dear ! We 
really couldn't have waited till morning to see you. 

{They sit down facing one another on the sofa.') 

Helen. Yes, I know ; I felt the same way. Yet we 
haven't seen each other for five years, — you'd hardly think that 
a few more hours could make much difference I 

Ger. Especially when it seems so utterly natural to see you 
sitting there ! 

Helen. My dear, it seems so utterly natural to be sitting 
here ! Just as though I'd never been away ! 

Ger. Only, you know, it ought to be afternoon, with the 
tea things. Oh, don't you want some tea now ? 

Helen. No, — please ! I wouldn't sleep a wink ! 

Ger. That's so -, neither would I ! How foolish of me ! 
Such delightful tea we've been having, too ! Some that a 
friend of Marie's sent her from China. 

Helen. Really ! How nice ; tea is so good when it is 
good, and it's so hard to buy good tea. 

Ger. Yes, we've had the worst luck. The store we used 



4 THIS IS SO SUDDEN 

to buy ours from went out of business, and we tried for weeks 

to find a place where we — could — could (She slows 

down, pauses a full second, as a look of astonishment comes 
over her face ; then, explosively.') Great heavens! Helen 
Roberts, do you realize what's happening? You've just come 
back from five whole years in England, and we're sitting here 
discussing tea ! 

Helen. Why, yes ! but I thought it was a delicate little 
attention on your part, to make me feel at home. That's all 
I've done the last five years, — discuss tea. 

Ger. But gracious ! There ought to be a thousand things 
we want to say to each other. We ought to be just bursting 
with things to say, and — and I can't think of a blessed thing ! 

Helen. Neither can I ! Except drivel about our passage 
over, and that was simply one tea after another. 

Ger. {in a tragic tone). Doesn't it seem awful ? Not a 
thing to talk about ! 

Helen. It is rather an unheard-of predicament for two of 
our sex. Of course, the trouble is that we've written each other 
almost everything. 

Ger. But — but oughtn't there to be some things that you 
couldn't write in a letter? 

Helen. Not in our kind of letter. You even went to the 
extreme of giving me a detailed account of your opinion of 
Brahms. 

Ger. Well, I thought I might as well. I wanted you to 
know that I thought Brahms ought to be considered, at the 

very least, a {Breaks off short; rebellious ly.) No! 

No I I won't talk about Brahms ! I won't ! 

Helen. Then let's talk about tea. 

Ger. No, I won't talk about tea, either. Oh, do think of 
some exciting topic of conversation ! 

Helen. If you're after excitement, I don't see why Brahms 
won't do. I never saw a musician yet who didn't get violently 
excited the minute he began arguing about Brahms. 

Ger. No, I mean something exciting that concerns us ! 

Helen. You? All right; why aren't you married? 

Ger. {taken aback). Me! Married! Me? 

Helen. Well, not only you, but Marie and Florence, — 
why aren't all of you married ? 

Ger. Why — why, gracious, / don't know ! 

Helen. But it's your business to know ! Hasn't any man 
ever asked you, any of you ? 



THIS IS SO SUDDEN 5 

Ger. Why, yes, that is, I'm not sure; let's see. Why, 
no 1 I don't believe any man ever has ! 

Helen. And for pity's sake, why not ? 

Ger. Why — why, I don't suppose any of them ever hap- 
pened to think of it ! 

Helen. Do you see many men ? 

Ger. Oh, yes ! They hang around in droves. All kinds, 
sizes, shapes and varieties ! 

Helen. And none of them ever talks business ? 

Ger. Talks what ? 

Helen. Business ; two rooms and kitchenette, or words to 
that effect. 

Ger. Gracious, no ! 

Helen. But they continue to hang around ? 

Ger. Oh, my, yes ! All the time ! 

Helen. Then I know what's wrong. You feed them too 
well! 

Ger. Why, Helen ! 

Helen. That's the trouble. A man never gets really into 
action as long as he's comfortable. If he's kept in a constant 
state of ease and comfort, he'll never budge. — But that's only 
the way you hold on to a man once you've got him. It's no 
way to effect a capture. As long as you three let it be known 
that you run a combination boarding-house and free lunch, 
you'll continue on your present spinsterial pathway. But sup- 
pose, now, that you suddenly execute a flank movement, and 
shut down on the food supply, plead the high cost of living or 
go into mourning or something. Well, if each and every one 
of you isn't proposed to inside of a month, then I'm no expert ! 
Why, if you only knew how easy it is to 

Ger. But, Helen ! Don't you understand ? We don't 
want to get married ! 

Helen. Nonsense ! Every girl wants to get married. 
That's why they go to college. They're afraid the men will 
get so much educated that the good old-fashioned methods of 
ensnarement will become obsolete. 

Ger. But we're different. We don't want to get married 
or do anything that would separate us. We're perfectly satis- 
fied just as we are. We earn enough to live on ; I've got my 
music, Marie her painting, and Florence her newspaper work. 

Helen. Newspaper work ? 

Ger. Oh, yes ! She runs a music column in one paper, 
and an art column in another, and she gets all her ideas from 



6 THIS IS SO SUDDEN 

US. It's lots of fun ! And don't you see ? We're all so de- 
pendent on one another. I do the cooking ; Marie does the 
marketing ; Florence keeps the accounts ; Marie gets me pupils, 
and I sell them her paintings. Florence does all the sewing 
and mending and washes the dishes, and Marie's the only 
person in the world who can do a thing with my hair ! Good- 
ness ! Do you suppose that we'd any of us give up such a well 
ordered and perfectly arranged existence for a man ? I should 
hope not ! 

Helen. Well, it does seem rather a bad bargain. But 
never you mind ! Some day a tall blond will come along with 
the love light in his eagle eye, and one of you will flop, and 
flop hard ! 

Ger. (offer a pause). Per-haps, (She meditates a mo- 
ment ; then, absently.) Only Jack's a brunette ! 

Helen (sharply). Jack! What Jack? Ah, I thought as 
much ! 

Ger. (breezily). Nonsense, Helen ! I just meant that — 
that — well. Jack Hemmingway has been here quite a lot lately. 

Helen. M-m-m-m ! You mean frequently, or for long 
stretches ? 

Ger. Both. And a little while ago he inherited some 
money. Not much, but enough. 

Helen. Enough for what? 

Ger. Why — why, for theatres and dinners and taxicabs 
and so on. It's been such fun ! And of course if he went and 
got married, that would spoil it all ! 

Helen. Unless you married him. 

Ger. Oh, but— but I meant — for the three of us ! 

Helen. So he's attentive to each of you ? 

Ger. Oh, no ; to all of us ! 

Helen. You mean all of you at once? 

Ger. Yes ! 

Helen. He's not a man; he's a Cook's Tour! Well, I 
suppose if you're so well equipped with brotherly love as all 
that, matrimony really would be rather superfluous. 

Ger. Oh, entirely ! (Pensively.) But — but he might go 
and marry some one not in the family ! 

Helen. Don't worry; he won't let himself be captured by 
an outsider so long as he has three charmers like you girls to 
adore and feed him. 

Ger. But— but we don't adore him — at least not in public I 

Helen. Does he kiss you ? 



THIS IS SO SUDDEN 7 

Ger. Goodness, no ! 

Helen. Has he ever tried to ? 

Ger. No ! 

Helen. Has he ever suggested it ? 

Ger. No ! 

Helen. M-m-m S That looks bad. It means you're deal- 
ing with a perfect gentleman. And they're the ones that al- 
ways do the absolutely unexpected. 

Ger. Oh, but Jack won't 1 And even if he did, I'm sure 

that he'd Oh, but he won't ! Besides, it — it would spoil 

everything ! Helen, if— if he did, do Which one of us 

do you think he'd choose? 

Helen. How should I know ? What's he like ? What's 
he interested in ? 

Ger. Well, he loves music. He always gets me to play 
for him. But he's an artist by profession, and Marie's his 
favorite model. And last week he took Florence to the theatre 
three times, because he's interested in the drama. They both 
write plays, you know. 

Helen. That's nothing ; so do I. So do you. So does 
everybody. 

Ger. I suppose so. But if Jack marries one of us, it won't be 
because of similar tastes. He's interested in almost everything ! 

Helen. Well, anyway, you're the prettiest. 

Ger. Jack doesn't think so. He thinks Marie is, and I 
think Florence is. 

Helen. You say you're a good cook? 

Ger. Yes, but so are the others, 

Helen. You're the most athletic. 

Ger. Oh, no ! We're about the same. 

Helen. Great heavens ! Then why don't you match pen- 
nies for him ? 

Ger. But — but we don't want him ! That is, except the 
way that we've got him. Why, we never thought of marrying 
him ! The idea never entered our heads ! That is, not until 
now ! 

Helen. Then my seed has fallen on fertile soil? 

Ger. N-o, I don't think so. In fact, I think you've given 
us a timely warning. We — we're all so fond of Jack, and — 
and it would be so hard to get along without him. Why, now 
that you have opened our eyes, we'll be on our guard, and if 

he shows any signs of committing matrimony, why — why 

Oh, but 1 know he won't. I know he won't ! 



8 THIS IS SO SUDDEN 

Helen. Oh, have it your own way. But mark my words. 
That kind of blissful arrangement never lasts long. Some other 
man may appear on the horizon. 

Ger. Nonsense ! No one could ever be as nice as Jack. 

Helen. Well, how about some other girl ? 

Ger. Y-es, I know — but — don't you think that I — that we 
could hold him — all three of us ? 

Helen. Not if he was in love with her ! 

Ger. Love ? Pooh ! 

Helen. Yes, love. All men are capable of it, and nice 
men especially so. 

Ger. Well, if we see him falling in love we'll What 

are the symptoms ? 

Helen. Sometimes there aren't any. Sometimes a pro- 
posal comes out of a clear sky. 

Ger. Oh ! Well, let's hope that Jack has symptoms first, 
so that we can save him from the designing female. Don't 
worry ; I'll call a council of war this evening, and we'll prepare 
for all emergencies. 

Helen. He might fool you some other way. He might go 
in for golf ! 

Ger. Horrors ! Do you suppose so ? Let's change the 
subject ! We've talked about Jack enough ; it will make him 
conceited. Anyway, I've thought of something to tell you. 
Do you remember I wrote you that I'd tried my hand at com- 
posing ? 

Helen. I believe that you did mention that you had given 
way to temptation. 

Ger. Well, I've had two songs published, and I've just 
finished a third ! 

Helen. Splendid ! I suppose Florence wrote the words, 
and Marie designed the cover ? 

Ger. No, indeed ; Jack did ! Oh, dear, we weren't going 
to talk about Jack, were we? Well, to continue; I feel sure 
that if I tried to do something bigger I could, an operetta, you 
know, or even a short opera, so Jack's writing a 

Helen. Jack, Jack, Jack ! Come, now ; confess ! 

Ger. Confess ? Confess what ? 

Helen. That you're not so entirely indifferent to Jack ? 

Ger. Indifferent ? Of course not ! I — I like Jack a lot, 
but — but I'm not in love with him, if that's what you mean ! 
I — I don't like him any more than the others do ! That is, I 
— I don't ! Really, really, I don't ! 



THIS IS SO SUDDEN Q 

> 

Helen, Really ? 
Ger. Really, really, really ! 
Helen. Then I suppose you don't ! Go on ! 
Ger. Well, you see, I've written the opening chorus, and 
Jack is 

(A door slams ; she pauses ; Florence comes dashing in.') 

Flor. Oh, Gertrude, Gertrude ! What do you suppose ? 
(Sees Helen.) Why, Helen ! 

(She falls on her neck ; kisses her exuberantly.') 

Helen. Dear me ! You seem excited ! 

Flor. Excited? Well, I should say so! I've just been 
proposed to ! 

Both. No! Where? Who? 

Flor. Right on the campus ! I was hurrying home, and I 
heard some one call, so I turned around, and there was 
Jack 

Ger. Jack ! 

Helen. Jack ! 

Flor. Yes, Jack Hemmingway ! 

Helen. Upon my word ! 

Ger. Go on. 

Flor. Well, he came up and shook hands, and started to 
walk to the subway with me. He didn't say anything for a 
few minutes, and then he suddenly whirled around and grabbed 
my hands and asked me to marry him ! 

Ger, And — and what did you say ? 

Flor. I — -I said it was so sudden. 

Ger. And you didn't say yes? 

Flor. Why, no — I said I'd let him know — that I'd write 
him. 

Ger. Thank heaven ! 
\ Flor. Why — why ? 
' Helen. Yes ; why " Thank heaven" ? 

Ger, Why — why — simply that — that I thought we'd agreed 
that none of us was to marry him. 

Flor. What? 

Ger. That is — why — we — we had a plan all worked out, 

and it doesn't seem fair to — to Well, you started ahead 

of time, and spoiled everything. 

Flor, I don't understand. 



10 THIS IS SO SUDDEN 

Ger. Why — why — you see, I — we'd never thought of Jack 

in that light, and — and — it — seemed as though — as though 

(Breaks doivn and commences to weep.') Oh, I do think it's 
too mean for anything ! 

Flor. Gertrude! Dearest! You don't mean you're jealous 
of me? 

Ger. No ! No ! But— I'm — disappointed. 

Flor. You poor dear ! Why, I never dreamed you were 
in love with him. 

Ger. I'm not in love with him I But — but — I hate to see 
our lovely plan spoiled. 

Flor. That's all right, dear ! I'm not going to marry him, 
anyway ! 

Ger. You're not? 

Flor. Goodness, no ! Why, I Even if I did, I 

couldn't bear to make you unhappy. 

Ger. You darling ! 

Flor. I'll write him to-night, and tell him that there is ab- 
solutely nothing doing ! You — you don't want me to add a 
postscript, a deep secret postscript, that you were terribly cut 
up over his proposing to me ? 

Ger. Gracious, no ! I'm — I'm not in love with him. Not 
the least bit ! Really I'm not. ( Wistfully.) I — I don't care 
how much he proposes to you. 

Flor. Well, he won't do it again I Here, I'll write to him 
now, and tell him that all is over between us ! 

{Starts to write.) 

Ger. But — but do you think he'll get over it ? 

Flor. Of course ! It was raining, and his feet were wet ; 
that's all ! 

Helen. That was probably it. Seven of the men who 
proposed to me before I was twenty chose rainy days, and six 
of them didn't have on rubbers, (Flor. coiitinues writing; 
Ger. sinks down on the sofa with a most dejected air.) Why, 
what's the matter, Gertrude ? You look pale ! 

Ger. Oh, — I — I — I'm just so relieved that Jack — isn't — 
isn't going to get married. 

Helen. Maybe he is, though ! Maybe he'll ask you next. 

Ger. {clapping her hands together). Oh, I — I — well, that 
would be all right, because I'd refuse him, of course ! 

Helen. Of course ! 



THIS IS SO SUDDEN II 

Flor. Here. The letter's finished ; I'll mail it at once. 

Ger. Were — were you very firm ? 

Flor. Firm as Gibraltar ! 

Ger. Then thaf s all right ! Do hurry and mail it ! 

Flor. {starting out). In a jiffy, 

(A door bangs ; Marie enters 07i the run.) 

Marie {throwing her wraps in every direction). Girls ! 

I Oh, Helen ! You ! {Kisses her. ) Thank heaven, 

there's one experienced person here ! Girls, I've been pro- 
posed to ! 

All. No ! 

Marie. Yes ! Not an hour ago ! I was working at the 
studio on Mrs. Sherman's portrait, and some one knocked, but 
I was so busy I didn't want to be disturbed, so for a long time 
I didn't answer. The knocking went on. Then I opened the 
door, and there was Jack ! 

All. Jack Hemmingway? 

Marie. Yes ! Dear old Jack ! I told him he couldn't 
come in, but he said it was very important, so I let him — and 
then before I knew it, he'd asked me to marry him ! 

All. Good heavens ! 

Ger. And — and what did you say ? 

Marie. Why, I— I said it was so sudden ! 

Flor. Just what I said. 

Marie. Just what you said ? 

Flor. Gracious, yes ! Jack just proposed to me ten min- 
utes ago. 

Marie. Well ! And did you accept? 

Flor. Did you? 

Marie. No, I — I told him I'd let him know to-morrow. 

Flor. I said I'd write. I have already. 

Marie. Did you say yes ? 

Flor. No, indeed ! I refused quite firmly ! Don't you 
want me to add a postscript saying that you refuse quite firmly, 
too ? 

Marie. Why, no, I don't think so. 

Flor. Oh, well, if you'd rather write yourself 

Marie. Yes, and — and I think I'll say )^es. 

Ger. Oh, Marie ! You wouldn't? 

Marie. Why, Gertrude ! I don't see why I shouldn't. 

Ger. Oh, but — but 



12 THIS IS SO SUDDEN 

Marie. He asked me. 

Ger. Yes, but — — 

Marie. And he's a darling boy. 

Ger. {wailing). Oh, but Marie ■ 



Marie (J71 amazejnent). Why, I believe you're in love with 
him yourself. 

Ger. I'm not ! I'm not ! But — but — there's the plan 

Marie. What plan? 

Ger, Why — why — you see — it 

Helen. Gertrude thinks that since you three are so indis- 
pensable to each other, and Jack is so indispensable to all of 
you, you ought to keep him just as he is. 

Ger, Yes, that's it ! You know, Marie, if you went and 
got married, my hair would never look the same again ! 

Marie. Oh, well, I suppose I'm not so very keen about 
Jack, — about marrying him, I mean. 

Ger. Oh, you darling ! {Kisses her.) You'll tell him 
to-morrow? 

Marie. Yes. 

Ger. (/^ Flor.). And you'll mail that letter right away ? 

Flor. Yes. 

Ger. Oh, how splendid ! I {The telephone bell rings.) 

Dear me, I wonder who that can be, at this hour of the 
night! {Takes down the receiver.) Hello! Hello! Yes — 
this is Gertrude. Who ? Oh ! Jack ! (Helen throws up 
her hands ; the other two cross toward the 'phone in great ex- 
citement.) Yes. No, I'm not busy. No, I'm not too tired 
to listen. Why — why, Jack ! This — this is so sudden ! 
(Marie and Flor. smother a shriek and fall into each other's 
arms.) Oh, Jack, I — I'll tell you to-morrow. No, really — 
not now. No, Jack — really I can't — to-morrow — really — to- 
morrow — yes ! Good-bye ! {She puts down the receiver, and 
at once becomes hysterical.) Oh — oh, girls, did you ever hear 
of anything so — so 

Helen. I told you that a perfect gentleman was capable of 
anything ! Jack certainly has a bad case of matrimonium 
tremens ! Well, what are you going to do ? Take my advice, 
and you'll send him a round robin letter of regret. 

All. Oh, but 

Helen. Ah ! So you all want him, really ? 

Ger. No. I don't want him. I wouldn't have a man who 
had proposed to any one else, 

Marie. Well, I'm not particularly anxious ! 



THIS IS SO SUDDEN I3 

Flor. Not for mine, either. 

Helen. Then get rid of him. 

All. Oh, but 

Helen. Well, for heaven's sake ! (She gazes at them in 
utter despair. The telephone bell rings.') Gracious ! You 
don't believe he's going to ask me now, do you? 

Ger. (answering the 'phone). Yes, this is apartment 34 ; 
yes, Miss Roberts is here. 

Helen (sinking into a chair). Mercy on us ! This is so 
sudden ! 

Ger. Oh, Miss Farr ! Send her up ! (Puts down the re- 
ceiver.) It's Margaret Farr; she's calling for you. 

Helen. Oh, yes ! I 'phoned her that I was coming here, 
and she could take me home if she wanted to. Well, girls, I'm 
going to leave you to your own devices regarding brother Jack. 
Of course, never having met the gentleman, I can't offer an ex- 
pert opinion, but my unofficial advice is — can him 1 

Ger. Oh, but 

(The door -bell rings ; Flor. goes and returns followed by 
Margaret.) 

Mar. Greetings, Helen ! (Kisses her.) How are you, 
girls? My, but it's been ages since I saw you ! 
Marie. I know; won't you sit down? 
Mar. Can't possibly; it's terribly late. 
Helen. Then I'm afraid we'll have to go. 

(Puts on her wraps.) 

Mar. Helen's going to have tea with me to-morrow after- 
noon; won't you come, too? I do so want you to meet my 
intended. 

Flor. Your intended ? Why, you're not engaged ? 

Mar. Yes! Didn't you know? I've been engaged for a 
week to the dearest man ! Oh, I know you'll all love Jack ! 

All. Jack ! 

Ger. Jack — Jack Hemmingway? 

Mar. No. Jack Baker. 

All (wiltifig into chairs). Oh ! 

Mar. Why, what's the matter? 

Helen, Nothing, dear. I'll tell you on the way home. 
Good-night, girls ; and remember what I told you, can him. 

All (faintly). Yes. 

Mar. Good-night ! 



14 THIS IS SO SUDDEN 

(JShe and Helen go out.) 
All {faintly). Good-night. 

{They sit there for several moments f looking at each other 

hopelessly.) 

Marie. Well ? 
Flor. Well ? 
Ger. Well? 

{There is a long pause ; suddenly Flor. springs to her feet.") 

Flor. Why, why, how perfectly ridiculous ! 

The Others. What ? 

Flor. Why, it's a bet, of course ! Men are always making 
crazy bets like that. Jack's bet some man that he can get a 
girl to accept him within twenty-four hours, or something like 
that. 

Ger, I don't believe it. 

Marie. Well, I do ! It's just like Jack. 

Flor. He probably thought we wouldn't mind, because 
we're such good friends. 

Ger. Well, I mind. I think it's horrid. 

Marie. Oh, no. We all know each other so well. 

Flor. Of course ! But still he deserves to lose the bet for 
not taking us into his confidence. 

Marie. Oh, no ! Jack would play fair ; he wouldn't win 
a bet on a frame-up. 

Ger. Well, I — I think it's perfectly horrid. I — I'm going 
to bed ! 

{She goes out mournfully.) 

Marie. Well, I suppose we might as well do the same. 

Flor. Yes, but 

Marie. What is it ? 
Flor. Oh, nothing ! 
Marie. Then come along ! 

{She switches out the light and they go off. There is a pause ; 
Flor. steals back and takes down the telephone receiver.) 

Flor. Hello ! 639 Spring. Hello, — Jack ? This is Flor- 
ence. Jack, was — was it a bet ? Then — then I'll say yes, just 
for a little while, though, because — because I'm engaged al- 



THIS IS SO SUDDEN 15 

ready, you know. Y-e-s. Bob Durant ! Oh, for ever so 
long ! Yes — all right. You're a dear, Jack ! Good-bye ! 

(^As she t's about to go out, she hears a noise and hides. 
Marie enters and goes to the telephone ; takes down the 
receiver,") 

Marie. Hello, hello ! 639 Spring. Hello, Jack. This 
is Marie. Yes — Jack, tell me, was — was it a bet? Oh, how 
perfectly darling ! Then, Jack — if you want, I'll — I'll say 
yes, — but just for a little while, you know, because — because — 
well, I'm — I'm engaged already ! Oh, yes, for weeks and weeks ! 
To Harry Fisher. Oh, how darling of you ! Jack, you're 
simply adorable. Yes — yes. All right ! Yes — good-night. 

(She hangs up the receiver. Flor. pounces upon her.) 

Flor. Oh, Marie, you darling ! 

Marie. You heard ? 

Flor. Yes ! And so am I ! Bob Durant ! 

Marie. Oh, dearest ! Sh ! What's that? 

(They both draw back into the shadow as Ger. comes steal- 
ing in in a dressing gown. She goes to the telephone and 
takes down the receiver.) 

Ger. Hello! Hello! 639 Spring. Hello, is this Jack? 
Jack, this — this is Gertrude. Jack, it — it wasn't a bet, was it? 
Oh, you darling ! I knew it wasn't ! Oh, dearest ! No, of 
course you won't have to wait till to-morrow ! Yes ! — Yes— • 
yes — yes, yes, yes ! Oh, Jack, you don' t know how happy I am ! 
Yes — all right ! To-morrow at eleven. Yes — yes 1 Good- 
night, dearest — yes ! Good-night ! Good-night ! 

(She hugs the telephone instrument ecstatically for a mo- 
ment ; then she steals out of the room. The others come 
forward and execute a wild dance of Joy.) 



CURTAIN 



B* US* Pinero's Plays 

Price, 50 Ceite €acl> 



HJliri PH AN1MFI Pl^y i" Four Acts. Six males, five females. 
lTllii~V«ni\lll^£iLi Costumes, modern; scenery, three interiors. 
Plays two and a half hours. 

THE NOTORIOUS MRS. EBBSMITH '^l^^'^^^^, 

males, five females. Costumes, modern; scenery, ail interiors. 
Plays a full evening. 

THF PRHFIIPATF Playln Four Acts. Seven males, five 
int r I\v/rijlUrtl El females. Scenery, three interiors, rather 
elaborate ; costumes, modern. _ Plays a full evening. 

TUr Cr'UAni MICTDUCC Farce in Three Acts. Ninemales, 
inCi OV/llUtfLlmollVEiOO seven females. Costumes, mod- 
em ; scenery, three interiors. Plays a full evening. 

THE SECOND MRS. TANQUERAY ^lirl^ZXe 

females. Costumes, modern; scenery, three interiors. Plays a 
full evening. 

QWI7FT I AVFlSinFR Comedy in Three Acts. Seven males, 
OWJuEil LAVEillL'EiIv four females. Scene, a single interior, 
costumes, modern. Plays a full evening. 

TUC TUTTMrkUDDHT T Comedy in Four Acts. Ten males, 
inCi inUlll/EilVDULil nine females. Scenery, three interi- 
ors; costumes, modern. Plays a full evening. 

TUF TIMFQ Comedy in Four Acts. Six males, seven females. 
ini!i lllrlEiO Scene. a single interior; costumes, modern. Plays 
fi full evening. 

TUr lUCAVrD CFY Comedy in Three Acts. Eight males, 
IrlL WI!iAI\.£iI\ uEiA eight females. Costumes, modern; 
scenery, two interiors. Plays a full evening. 

A WIFE WITHOUT A SMILE ^remlils.fourlemiirs; 

Costumes, modern ; scene, a single interior. Plays a full evening. 



Sent prepaid on receipt of price by 

Salter ?|. paker & Company 

No. 5 Hamilton Place, Boston, Massachusetts 



LIBRARY OF CONGRESS 

lllillilllllillllillilllll 

015 940 046 3 



Cf)e milim. Waxxm exiition 
of Paps 



A5 Ton I IITP IT Comedy in Five Acts. Thirteen males, four 
AD IvU Muju II females. Costrtmes, picturesque ; scenery, va- 
ried. Plays a full evening. 

|*iM|r I p Drama in Five Acts. Ni'ne males, five females. Oos- 
vAi!llJUi<C tumes, modern j scenety, varied. Plays a full evening. 

INISnMAII ^^y in' •Five-v,Acts. *Tiiirteen males, three females. 
UlUvIIlAA Scenery Varied ; costuines, Greek. Plays a full evening. 

MADV STflAifT i$ragedy in Five Acts. Thirteen males, four fe- 
UlAIVl Ot'LIAni ijjiales, and supernumeraries. Costumes, of the 
period ; scenery, valried a,nd elaborate. Plays a full evening. 

THE MWBM.OF TENICE g'^^X^eVl^J^Ts. IVii^t^, 

picturesque ; ;'6cenery vaified. Plays a full evening. 

DirHFl I'Pl]' •^1'^^'^ Five Acts. Fifteen males, two females. Scen- 
WvIlEMEU- . ery elaborate ; costumes of the period. Plays a full 
evening. * * ■, 

mn|yilC,,;^omedy in Five Acts. Nine males, five females. 
JIlTALr^ SceiJi^ty varied; costumes of the period. Plays a 
tull evening. 

SuE STOOPS TO CONQUER ma^l,Lur females .''scenery va- 
ried ; costumes of the period. Plays a full evening. 

TWELFTH NIGHT; OR, WHAT YOU WILL irs^-^^eimS 

three females. Costumes, picturesque ; scenery, varied. Plays a 
full evening. 



Sent prepaid on receipt of price by 

Walttt ^. "Bafeer S, Company 

No. 5 Hamilton Place, Boston, Massachusetts 

6. J. PARKHILL a CO , PRINTERS, BOSTON, U.S.A. 



